Opinions don’t travel — lessons do.
This article is part of our Leadership Series — reflections on inspiration, influence, and the choices that shape meaningful achievement.
“The quality of our thinking determines the quality of our decisions.” — Ray Dalio
The Difference Between an Opinion and a Lesson
We all have opinions.
But opinions, by their nature, are personal. They’re tied to the moment, the mood, the situation, and the individual.
Lessons are different.
A lesson is something others can actually use.
It stands beyond our own experience and helps someone else make sense of their world.
That’s why lessons travel.
And most good lessons sit on top of a mental model — a way of thinking that others can understand, adapt, and apply.
A Mental Model I Use for Speaking Requests
Here’s a simple example from my own work.
Like many people in the training field, I’m asked to speak on webinars or at events. Early in my career, I made these decisions based on how I felt in the moment — my opinion.
This meant I said yes to some talks that turned out wonderfully… and others I later regretted giving.
I realized my opinion-based approach to decision-making wasn’t sustainable.
So I starting using a mental model.
Today, whenever I’m asked to speak, I run the request through three questions:
Will I learn something?
Will I earn something?
Will it be fun?
If the request meets two out of the three, I say yes.
If it meets fewer than two, I politely decline.
It’s simple, but it works.
It helps me explain my reasoning — to myself and to others. And more importantly, it’s something others can use.
That’s the value of a mental model: it moves you from “Here’s what I think…” to “Here’s how I think…”.
“I’d Like to Understand How You Think”
When I served as VP of Operations for an Asia-based BPO, my new second-in-command once said to me:
“I’d like to understand how you think.”
At the time, it felt surprisingly direct.
But now I see the wisdom in it.
Because people don’t just want your opinion.
They want your reasoning — the why behind your decision.
How to Make Better Decisions: Stop Leading with Opinion
And when leaders share the thinking beneath the surface, they shape how others think too. That’s influence.
That’s leadership.
From Opinion to Lesson
So the next time you’re about to say,
“Here’s what I think…”
Pause for a moment and ask yourself:
“Can I turn this into a lesson? Can I explain how I think?”
Because opinions don’t travel very far.
But lessons do.
The Monday Morning Lens
Here’s something you can do this week:
Think of one decision you made recently.
Ask yourself:
- What was my opinion in that moment?
- What was the mental model beneath it?
- How could I share that model with someone on my team — clearly and simply?
You don’t need a grand framework.
You just need clarity.
And that clarity is a gift.
Thank You for Reading
I regularly share stories, strategies, and insights from our work across Contact Centers, Customer Service, and Customer Experience. If this resonates, I’d love to stay connected.
You can drop me a line anytime, or subscribe on our site.
Daniel Ord
[email protected]
www.omnitouchinternational.com
Cover photo by Luis Eusebio on Unsplash
